HONOLULU—With just a few minutes left in the 2nd quarter and the NFC already leading 42-0, reporters covering the Pro Bowl unanimously decided to leave at halftime and fabricate the details of the remainder of the game. “This is stupid,” exclaimed Associated Press writer Karen Douglas. “We’re the only people watching this crap. Why don’t we all just dip out at halftime, grab a few drinks and figure out what we’ll tell everyone happened in the second half?” to which the entire press box agreed.

Even a late 1st half touchdown by the AFC’s Jamaal Charles didn’t dissuade the media from carrying out their plan as they quickly filed out of the press box and congregated on the beach to order cocktails and discussed what would happen the remainder of the game. “Let’s say the AFC came back and made it closer in the 2nd, just so the game doesn’t sound as crappy as it is,” suggested Fox Sports’ Jay Glazer as he chased down a Frisbee thrown by ESPN’s Adam Schefter. “We’re all cool with giving DeAngelo Hall the MVP too, correct?” continued Glazer. “There’s an off chance someone might have watched a bit of...