We’re barely a fortnight into spring training, and we’ve already had our share of peculiar stories. Between Miguel Cabrera and Coco Crisp’s propensity to operate motor vehicles drunk, Josh Beckett getting knocked in the dome piece during batting practice, AJ Pierzynski getting pulled over in full uniform, a Cubs dugout brawl and Padres bench coach Rich Renteria getting his grill rearranged yesterday morning, it looks like the MLB pre-season is filled with a bunch of jackasses—thus this reworked movie poster.