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Team that can’t win World Series may at least win Oscar

OAKLAND—Having only won one playoff series this millennium and unlikely to qualify for MLB’s playoffs, much less advance to and win a World Series, the Oakland A’s and GM Billy Beane have taken solace in the fact that they may at least win an Academy Award, as they have been nominated for six Oscars for their role in Moneyball.

“Obviously,” said Beane, creator of the famed “Moneyball” method, “we’re a professional baseball team. And as a pro ball club your ultimate goal is to win the World Series. However, I’ll be the first to admit that the Moneyball approach isn’t going to win us a World Series, but hey, maybe it can win us some Oscars.”

Beane admitted that while he’d like the A’s to be mentioned in the same breath as historically successful franchises such as the Yankees, Red Sox and Cardinals, he was willing to settle for being lumped in with mediocre Oscar winning films like Crash, Chicago and Driving Miss Daisy.

“Besides,” added Beane, who said he plans on hanging a banner commemorating the Oscar nomination and will add another one if they win, “We’d be the only pro sports franchise to win an Oscar.” When informed that the Arizona Cardinals won and Oscar in 1996 for Cuba Gooding’s role in Jerry Maguire, Beane shrugged and said, “Arizona Cardinals and the Oakland A’s—pretty good list if I do say so myself.”

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