Skip Bayless embarrassed to tell everyone at party what he does for a living

BRISTOL, CT—While attending a cocktail party this past weekend, ESPN television personality Skip Bayless tried to reveal as little about his job as possible in fear of people learning that he makes a living criticizing athletes, spouting off ignorant opinions and eroding the once respectable profession of sports journalism.

When confronted with the question of his particular line of work, Bayless would be as vague as possible. “Oh nothing really,” said the First Take co-host nonchalantly. “I talk about sports on TV, that’s about it.”

Bayless, in an attempt to change the subject away from his embarrassing career, then asked the stranger about his profession, but the person was too intrigued in Bayless’ line of work and continue to probe.

“So you announce highlights and report scores and such?” the person asked.

“No, that’s another division in the company,” replied a sheepish Bayless.

“Then you do analysis? Break down plays, provide expert opinions to what happened in the game?”

“Not exactly,” said Bayless, growing increasingly uncomfortable.

Sensing the acquaintance was about to discover the truth of his unsavory line of work, Bayless attempted to walk away, claiming he needed to talk to someone across the room, however his escape plan was foiled when the acquaintance asked, “Oh, did you see the Heat game the other night? What do you think of that LeBron guy?”

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