EUGENE - The Oregon Ducks are attempting to turn their basketball team into a powerhouse, just like their football team. They've gone to every juvenile detention center across the Northwest to picks up some freshmen. And they've pretty much already locked up Michigan State coach Tom Izzo by throwing bajillions of NIke dollars at him. Michigan State has denied these reports. But whatever, the final piece of the puzzle is now in place as Oregon attempts to use their ties with Nike to lure NBA hall of famer MIchael Jordan, back into playing college ball. "I think Jordan was born to be a Duck," says Ducks fanatic and program president, Darron Rubnut. "With Tom Izzo as coach, we'll finally make it out of the NIT. But to truly go all the way, we know we need a few more guys.  We have people working on our list as we speak, calling Magic Johnson, Wilt Chamberlain, LeBron James, OJ Simpson– wait he's football... we also are pursuing Candace Parker and everyone that was on that Hoosiers team back in the 80s that was coached by Lex Luthor."