Minnesota’s new stadium to include Viking ship that will burn and pillage sections after each touchdown

ST. PAUL, MN—Inspired by the large pirate ship that the fellow sea faring Tampa Bay Buccaneers have in their stadium, the Minnesota Vikings have announced that their brand new $975 million stadium’s centerpiece will be a full-sized Viking ship that will celebrate each touchdown by burning and pillaging a random seating section.

Just as the Buccaneers fire cannons from their 103-foot-long ship after each score, the Viking will hire a cast of professional actors and local vagrants to disembark the boat after every Vikings touchdown to terrorize a lucky group of spectators by setting a series of small fires and robbing them of their personal belongings.

“Imagine the excitement if you’re a fan,” said Vikings Chief Marketing Officer Steve LaCroix, “One second you’re watching Adrian Peterson run in for a touchdown, the next second a group of large men wielding battle weapons are setting fire to a pile of napkins in your row and demanding your beer money as ransom. It’s fan interaction you won’t find anywhere else in professional sports!”

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