Indianapolis, IN--Overcome by frustration, Colts quarterback and known perfectionist, Peyton Manning, unleashed a furious harangue on rookie surgeon Patrice Dent, who’s dismal performance during preseason surgery has left the Colts with one of the most embarrassing offenses in recent memory. The public nature of the incident, which occurred in the lesser trafficked side line of the hospital cafeteria, has served to fuel a growing concern over the tenuous QB-doctor relationship. While Dent attempted to gloss over the incident saying “that wasn’t Peyton talking, it was the morphine,” the surgeons trouble adapting to the Colts hurry-up surgical style has been on display all preseason.

“It was unprofessional of me to blow up like that when the guy was just trying to enjoy his tapioca,” said a bandaged Manning, “but on our team you’ve got 2 minutes to drill into someone and that it’s.” Manning cited the surgeons many missteps, from blowing his reads and performing a vasectomy to false starts before the anesthesia set in, as reasons for his frustrations, but claims the catalyst for the lashing was the result of Dent’s poor route running. “He was supposed to run an incision pattern from my Phrenic nerve to my Occipital condyle," said Manning, "but instead ran it to my traverse cervical nerve. Those types of miscues are unacceptable, and also unbearably painful. ”