Kentucky not allowed to go out and play until they finish their Native America diorama

NEW ORLEANS—The Kentucky Wildcats may be favored to win this year’s national championship, but if they plan on going out to play basketball against in-state rival Louisville on Saturday, they’ll first have to complete their diorama for Professor Keating’s Native American Studies course that is due next Thursday.

“They know the rules,” said Kentucky coach John Calipari. “Homework first, then they can go out and play. If I don’t see a completed shoebox diorama accurately depicting life of a tribal plains Indian by Saturday afternoon, there will be no basketball.”

The Wildcat players, while acknowledging the “Homework First” rule, tried petitioning Coach Calipari for an exemption considering the circumstances. “This is like the biggest game of the year,” said Kentucky forward Anthony Davis. “Everyone is going to be watching. We have to play!”

“Yeah,” chimed in forward Terrence Jones. “It’s not like we’ve done nothing. We already have one teepee and a couple horses done. Michael [Kidd-Gilchrist] just has to glue some cotton ball clouds in the sky and Doron [Lamb] is going to draw the tribes people, but he can’t do that until we get back to Lexington because he forgot to pack his colored pencils.”

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