New York Yankees right-hander A.J. Burnett has had a season to forget. Burnett, one of the highest-paid starting pitchers in the majors, has gone a disappointing 10-13 with an ugly 5.08 ERA. He also cut himself earlier in the year after slamming his hands on plexiglass in frustration following another poor outing. Burnett even lied about it initially, telling reporters that he sustained the cuts falling down a flight of stairs. Which only made it worse.

Then, on Friday night, Burnett showed up to Camden Yards to make his scheduled start sporting a black eye. He refused to discuss the shiner with reporters after the game, leading to speculation about who or what hit him in the face. Given his poor performance and constant Jekyll and Hyde inconsistency act on the mound, he has established a lot of enemies. Chief among them are Jorge Posada, who he has never had a rapport with as a battery mate, and likely New York general manager Brian Cashman, who handed out that fat contract two offseason ago. What about his wife?

Given Burnett's potential enemies list, playing the guessing game has made for entertaining sports blog/talk radio fodder.

No more, though. Using the process of elimination while playing Clue “Mystery of A.J. Burnett’s Black Eye," we have gotten to the bottom of it.

Here are the prime suspects.

And our conclusive findings.

So, yes, as many predicted, it was indeed Posada—hip, hip, Jorge!—who delivered the blow, with his fist, in the visiting lockerroom at Camden Yards. Which is too bad, because I was hoping it was the white-horse, K-Rod, at his father-in-law’s house.