CHICAGO - After the Dodgers placed Manny Ramirez on waivers last week, word got to Manny that he would picked up by the Sox. And Manny is now super psyched to be picked up by the Sox. Again. Due to Manny's colorblindness, aversion to geography and reading, he doesn't, in fact, know that the Chicago White Sox are not the Boston Red Sox. "I so excited to be playing for the Sox again," Manny told the press. "I get to see Dusty and Big Papi and Tito. And then there's that guy they picked up to run their Twitter account, Ozzie. He funny. And to top it all off, I know that the President Baraka Obama is a big, big fan of my Sox. And when I say Sox, I mean the greatest baseball team of all time! Not Manny's actual socks, silly!" The Dodgers are staying tight lipped about which Sox team Manny is actually going to because they're pissed they picked up such an idiot. "Manny cannot wait to get back into the outfield for the Sox and go play inside the scoreboard of the Gray Monster," said Manny.
