Happy Birthday to Maru, the Alpha & Omega of internet cats
Off the record, I don't give a rat's ass about cat videos. I get it, you're a cat. You like boxes and bags and laser pointers and birds and watching TV and doing cat things. Good job cat, you exist and your owner has an iPhone.
However, I realize the type of pull cats have around these parts and I'm not about to challenge the internet gods, so, on the record, I think cat videos are great. Before them the internet was a vast and hopeless wasteland filled only with pornography, free ringtones and unsourced websites in which we used to plagiarize term papers.
But thanks to their arrival, the internet is an adorable utopia, and we owe it all to Maru, the leader of the internet cats, he of 100 million views. Today we pay homage to the feline supreme commander on his 5th birthday by sacrificing time and bandwidth to his latest video. May Maru be blessed with endless paper bags, eternal cuteness and live out his remaining 7 to 10 years in unbridled bliss. All hail Maru!
[H/T Laughing Squid]
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